Letter To Myself: About Julian

Dear Crystal,

Thank you for finally giving in to your heart's desires. You've always wanted to go to the historic town Julian, after hearing about their apple pies and striking trails. You cried about stories in "A Woman Alone - Traveling Tales" - wishing you could be doing the same. 

Finally, you did. 

Volcan Mountain, Summit

You mustered guts and means to drive 120 miles in unfamiliar territory, forgetting about the "risks" of hiking alone with possible rattlesnakes and mountain lion sightings. You braved the steep inclines, the sketchy holes on the ground, the yellow spider on your thumb; the fact that you forgot your map - yet still, took on a different route down the trail. Your shoes broke while on top of the mountain. You scored hot blisters on each foot. You brushed all that off.  You simply savored two oranges and every gulp of that 150mL bottled water you had packed.

After the three hour and a half ordeal, you didn't relent. You combed every store on Julian's Main Street, limping from the blisters and a sore left hip flexor. In return, you discovered Cider Mill that turned out to be a fancy, dizzying relay of homemade goods (only cooks can relate). Since you are bringing home three whole pies, as a thoughtful gesture, you bought three different flavors from multiple pie shops. 

Julian Cider Mill

On the way to the car, your head spun. "I woke up at 3AM," you remembered as a nightmare disrupted the sleep you badly needed. Even the road to Julian - 79 Highway - is narrow and winding and totally out of your driving experience. The heat and the pain from hiking is finally kicking in. Is it time to go home now?

But there's still a Mining Tour.

Inside Eagle Pick Gold Mine, you absorbed every word from the tour guide. "How did miners work with candles in the dark? What about claustrophobia? It's creepy and cold here."

Julian's Eagle Creek Mining Tour ($10)

Miners chipped away Earth's ore to harvest fine-as-flour specks of gold. No one should have the audacity to complain about GPS failing in the wilderness. That happened to you, so you calmly pulled over and checked the PDF map you prepared the night before. The last 70 miles is probably your longest stretch without getting lost. 

Lake Cuyamaca

Along the way, you passed by Cuyamaca Ranco State Park and Anza-Borrego Dessert, taking mental notes on directions. Earlier in the day, you caught a glimpse of El Capitan - how glorious the sun and fog intertwined behind the lake. Perhaps you might bring your sisters and mother there. If not, you'll go alone. 

Inspiration Point

Nothing wrong with that. You're simply honoring your present disposition. You're doing what you love - travel and exploration. In times when people forget what makes their soul dance, you're reveling in it. Thanks for taking time.

My Top 5 Must-Haves

My Top-5 Must Haves reflect who I am at the core - practical, outdoorsy, and austere. I am so impressed by people who live simply but have great lives. Jean from Extra Petite, taught me to masterfully curate my wardrobe. I love quick and logical solutions to makeup. Also, I read a lot about the traveling life, because I find travelers the wisest bunch with zero-baggage. A minimalist life helps the environment and fosters freedom from attachment and debt.

These are the Top 5 Things I swear by:

1. Coconut Oil

Aussie-Chinese fashion blogger Margaret Zhang introduced me to extra virgin coconut oil. Here's one thing about her - every picture is like a Vogue editorial. She wrote in her blog:

"I don't use makeup. I just slather coconut oil on my face every night and morning. Weekly, I condition my hair with it, too."


If a beautiful girl benefits from all-natural coconut oil, then so can I. Two years later with daily use, I have smoother, clearer, whiter skin. Applying it before showering ended my dry skin problems from harsh winters. Research adds that extra virgin, unrefined coconut oil has anti-bacterial and anti-aging benefits. I can't list them all, but here's a good guide.

I use coconut oil for everything - rashes, small cuts, lotion, makeup remover, massage oil, hair mask, sugar scrub, etc. The skin absorbs it so quick, it makes it silky. Moreover, I keep a separate jar for cooking, like for chocolate mousse, frying, and adding a teaspoon for tea (it's so healthy you can eat it). The best part: I get to save money!

2. Leather Notebook

"Writing comes out of a superior devotion to reading.” -Eudora Welty

How do you remember what you just read? Long-hand writing has been proven to improve memory better than typing. For writers and readers alike, a leather notebook is a worthy investment. As my all-time favorite website, Lifehacker would say, "spend money where your time is." I bought this notebook from Martha Stewart's collection on sale at Staples for $4.50.

3. Scarf

I found a green scarf in an Amvet thrift store for $5. With delicate patterns and a pashmina/silk combo, this scarf is my shield slash fashion accessory. I bring it with me on long drives from San Diego to Arizona or Seattle to Bellingham and long-haul flights from Los Angeles to the Philippines.

Big scarfs can be used as a blanket, cover-up for chilly weather, or for sanitary reasons when you don't want to touch public seats. My college teammates teased me about sleeping in the car with a scarf covering my face. Yet, I'm the one who got most sleep that sustained my 3.8 GPA.

Buy one in quality fabric, possibly the most expensive you can afford. Or you can just be like me and peruse thrift stores. Good fabric = long-term use = multiple uses. Austere but on point.

4. Something Meaningful / Beautiful 

During freshman year, my mother gifted me with a set of pearl earrings. The reason why I don't waste money on any other earring is because this piece is all-encompassing - it's simple, timeless, practical in all sorts of dress and occasion, and holds a special reason. I now have a leather watch and an engagement ring to add to my daily arsenal. Truthfully, I don't own much "stuff," but the ones I do gets maximum wear and attention. Fashion people call this, "signature pieces."

Your thing doesn't have to be anything valuable. It simply needs to be dear and true to you.

5. A Bottle Of Water 

When I worked on a Raw Food seminar by Aris La Tham, he said:

"Bottled water is one of the biggest scams of modern-day society."

If big-name corporations can sell billions of packed, perfectly clear and tasteless liquid that stay in constant state forever, well, there must be something wrong with it. (Note: he also said nature's most perfect form of water is fresh coconut water.)

I understand the need for bottled water in times of calamity. But in our houses? What about  in our daily grind? I carry my own jug everywhere to keep hydrated. In turn, I save money and calories from sugary juices or colas. That bottle of water is in my waist pack, work bag, car, bedside table, refrigerator, work desk golf bag, etc. My fiance even jokes that I drink water more than a normal human being. The only downside I know is that I need a slightly bigger bag.

Extras: 

6. My prescription glasses - I'm myopic so I can't even see my glasses when I take them off. 

7. iPhone - I listen to audiobooks and podcasts when I'm driving. Also, for informing my loved ones where I am when I'm hiking alone.

                     

Whether I'm in San Francisco, San Diego, Cavite or Cebu, these five (or seven) things are my must-haves.  What do you bring with everyday?

DIY: How To Make Skirts Out Of Dresses

In grade school, we had a class where all we did was handcraft "stuff." I didn't like it since I'm quite bad with precise art (re: Sacred Geometry). In retrospect, sewing turned out to be a life-long skill along driving and cooking. Now as a grownup, my day job now is computer-intensive, so I prefer manual work to unwind.

One day, I found two oversized dresses in my Mom's closet. Why not make them into skirts? I googled, "how to make skirts out of dresses" then quickly picked up a garter and tailor's chalk from the hardware store. 

Skirt #1 : Bright Floral Pattern, Linen fabric, and Lined 

Color theory tells us that complementary colors pop. I love the blues, pinks and greens of this skirt for Spring and summer in the Philippines. I'm sure they will fare well in semi-formal outdoor gatherings and yet still be also versatile for work.

I started by cutting the excess fabric off the bottom and top. Then, I closed the lining by sewing with my hands. Lastly, I ironed fusable sewing tape to finish the hem.

Left: Too long and too boxy | Right: Pencil skirt for dressed up occasions

There's an invisible zipper in the back that you cannot see. For this, I followed this tutorial: 

Skirt # 2 : Lace, Lining, and Garter

The second item is a beige skirt from a size 10 Guess dress. I can't fathom giving up on its delicate lacework, so I decided to save the bottom half.

Following instructions from KIN DIY's video:

Left: Oversized and dowdy | Right: Lace and beige can be paired with everything

First, I cut the dress with a few inches of allowance for the garter to fit. Second, I sewed the hem and lace together by backstitching. Third, I folded about an inch for the garter. Third, I did an all-around backstitch, for the garter. Lastly, I closed it up.

The #1 thing about DIY'ing is knowing if it's worth the effort. Is the fabric high quality enough to worthy of saving? Will the clothes actually fit? Doing this took me about five hours (a.k.a learning curve) while watching '12 Years A Slave'.

The tactile results above cost me $4.88 for supplies.

Cheers for life skills!

-C. 

A 23-Year Old Finding Work

It's no surprise that you'll constantly find articles arguing if a college degree is still even relevant.  In the US, the unemployment rate is 12.2 % for 20-24 year-olds. 33% of those who work in jobs that don't need a college degree. According to Time, there are two things stacked against Millenials:

1. An increasingly unstable Earth to raise our families
2. A move from manufacturing to tech jobs, that demands increased level of training  and experience

Long before I graduated, I was already anxious about job prospects. I knew that I don't want to cohabit with strange roommates anymore and that living in downtown San Francisco is too expensive. I'm also an international student, so my VISA is subject to laws by the USCIS.

Then, I had to move to San Diego, a city where I had zero network. If you've ever tried looking at job boards, you might as well sob in despair. Despite my honest qualifications, I was about 80% under-qualified in producing media jobs. They require 2-5 year industry experience. As the irony goes: 

"You need a job to get experience, but you need experience to get a job."

Selfie from my desk. Double-screen, ergonomic chair, etc. and work is only from 6AM to noon.

Turning Point

When I came back from a vacation/engagement, I reached a turning point: find a job within a month or move back to the Philippines. But I have to give it 100% because I do need the experience and savings before I settle down.

I armed myself the best way I know how - read books. Two of them helped: One is Katie Couric's, "Best Advice I Ever Got." For the nights that I cried out of frustration, it helped to learn about how extraordinary people shaped their lives in their 20's. Two is "New Marketing and PR Rules" by David Meerman Scott. He discussed tangible steps of an effective job search. A tip that actually landed me a job: follow up with after interviews emails until they are clear to turn you down. 

Finally, I was called in a second job interview, one that offered me a salary on the spot. I knew that moment I stepped in that I wanted to work there. New building, calm office, full studio, and friendly hosts. I accepted the offer.

What I Do For A Living

As a programming assistant for Money Biz Life Network, I research stories for the hosts, transfer callers to the studio, and edit the show for web upload. Recently, I've also started working on producing a sports commentary by Lee Hacksaw. These are the top two most amusing things about my job:

1. I'm awestruck at the enunciation and charm of TV hosts. As their colleague, I get to talk to them and see them work magic everyday.

2. People from all over the US call us for financial advice. One retiree goes: "I need help.... What should I do with my $2 million?" And he was so sincere in his query.

Everyday, our hosts and manager say "Thanks for your help, Crystal." I read massive stories about horrible bosses, but there's not even a hint of drama in our office. My colleagues come to work, play music, run to the studio laughing two minutes before broadcast starts. Professional and kind, if I were to summarize my work environment.

Ray Lucia Sr. nicknamed me after the 70's song, 'Crystal Blue Persuasion.' One day he said, "Crystal, I'm using one of your articles, so I'll mention you on-air." 

What's Next?

When I was in school, all I wanted was to graduate. When I did, I got anxious about job hunting. When I found a job, I worried about earning more. As Gretchen Rubin said in "The Happiness Project":

"We are all constantly in different stages of happiness."

In hindsight, I shouldn't have been afraid of finding work. The common phrase from my graduating friends is: "I just need the stability of a job." That stability comes with routine (for me, waking up at 4:50 AM everyday)  and this question: "What's next for me?"

I'm obsessed about life-long learning, from Dan Coyle's LARP theory to Cal Newport's emphasis on deliberate practice. In fact, I'm currently enrolled at a Duke University MOOC on writing.

I did something two days ago that gave me an emotional high: volunteering for the OneDayInSanDiego project. I crafted questions for two veterans of Workshop for Warriors, drove to different locations, and worked with a filmmaker and a sound guy. One of them said at lunch: "What did you study in college? No wonder you sounded so natural."

Here is San Diego Mayor Kevin Faulconer and filmmaker Jodi Cilley after our interview:

Mayor Kevin Faulconer (middle) attended a home building project in Ocean Beach.  Filmmaker extraordinaire, Jodi Cilley (right), urged me to help with the One Day In San Diego Project. I constantly volunteer to refresh my producing chops.

Cal Newport' sums it best. According to him, there are three main components for great work:

1. Impact - When your work positively affects people or the world
2. Creativity - When your work enables to you personalize, deconstruct, think, and create
3. Control - When your work allows you to be flexible in terms growth

That's a tall order for a 23-year old. I'm sure even or older folks! So, I am not there yet. But this is a lifelong thing anyway. I'm leaving you with Pope Francis' remarkable take on work:

Why Do People Get Married?

I read a lot about science and faith, but this Christian book on marriage taught me many things about myself and how to treat others. Coincidentally, now is Holy Week, a ripe time to reflect on permanent lessons from the Bible.

I'm getting married soon. I've always believed that what I lack in experience, I can learn from books. Considering the trend of my Millennial generation, 44% of which claims that marriage is becoming obsolete, I’m still ‘young’ to settle down. Another trend is loss of trust in religion. Many of my peers blatantly claim being atheists or in the least, personalized their approach to faith. 

Dr. Gary Chapman's "The Marriage You've Always Wanted," hit many good points about relationships. If you’re in one, looking for one, or getting out of one - we will all benefit to reflect on many his wise, humbling advice.

What is the purpose of Marriage? 

Why can't people just co-habitate? 

Marriage was God’s answer for humankind’s deepest human need — union of life with another. This unity is to encompass all of life — the total union of two lives on the intellectual, social, physical, emotional and spiritual needs.

In other words, marriage is beyond the economic benefits or having children/companion. Marriage means the  blessing of two lives in the deepest possible way into a new unit that will both satisfy the individuals involved and serve the purposes of God.

My future husband, Jovi, is not my dumping ground. Our romantic phase will fade. We will fight bitterly. We will encounter tragedy. We will have to work on showing love both in words and actions every single day. Proving you love someone is like a second job.

But a husband's and wife's partnership signifies a higher purpose - oneness intellectually, physically, socially, emotionally and spiritually. That is a lot to ask, but has an eternal uptake if it works. 

Oneness is attained only as we are willing to confide failures as well as successes. 

Fighting

There are four communication qualities that can always predict a break-up:

1. Criticism
2. Defensiveness
3. Contempt
4. Stonewalling

Truthfully, I am guilty of #4. It's just that I'd rather be quiet than say hurtful words. Which, by the way, Dr. Chapman warns us as "high, heavy walls that develop." When a friend betrays my trust, I know that a wall is slowly emerging. This is even aggravated by our loved ones, especially since they are so close to us. Life is too short to let heavy walls exist around you. So don't. Discuss, be open, and move forward. 

Decision-Making

In 1793, Olympe de Gouges wrote a manifesto about women's right. She was beheaded a few months later. We've come a long way in our expression of gender equality today. In fact, marriages are treated as partnerships between the male and female.

But who makes a decision in a marriage?

The first rule is to wait. Almost all major discussions can, and will benefit, from waiting. After much discussion and if nothing surfaces, according to the Bible, the default decider is the husband. 

I was appalled. No way in the world. Right? 

"A wife may feel the challenge of submission, but she should also feel the security of a responsible husband, one who will make decisions when he must." - Dr. Chapman

It makes sense. Part of Jovi's attitude about decision-making is to let me do whatever I wanted. He had never, not even once, imposed on me. What a remarkable gift for a young woman such as myself. But as we enter in a marriage, I will have to yield to him. Not because I'm inferior, but because he has proven to make sound decisions in our last eight years together. And if he makes a mistake, here's a mantra of a wise wife:  “We goofed, but we’re together, and we’ll make it.”

I think now I know why Kris Aquino, in all of her wisdom and prowess, always had trouble with men.

What is the purpose of sex in a marriage? 

1. To procreate
2. To meet physical and emotional needs
3. To provide pleasure

According to Deuteronomy 24:5:

“If a man has recently married, he must not be sent to war or have any other duty laid on him. For one year, he is to be free to stay home and bring happiness to the wife he has married. The word translated “happiness” is elsewhere translated “pleasure” and is the same word that is used for sexual gratification. He is to stay home and pleasure his wife for one year."

Talk about a honeymoon!

Leaving Parents

“Honor your mother and father.” It’s the original commandment, a guideline from birth to death, and it stands forever. God’s pattern for marriage involves the “leaving” of parents and “cleaving” to one’s mate. It involves a change of allegiance. Psychologists call this “cutting the psychological apron strings.” If there is conflict, the husband is to lean to his wife. 

Money

Jovi and I are both under-buyers. We are on the same page about frugality, which as my financial adviser colleagues say, "is the best investment strategy." I'm so thankful that we are starting our marriage 100% debt-free, with even a little bit of savings to build our first household. 

“A prudent man foresees the difficulties ahead and prepares for them; the simpleton goes blindly on and suffer the consequences.” -Proverbs 22:33

All in all, these six points are the highlights of Dr. Chapman's book. They are not just sourced quotes, but have practical implications. Lessons so pragmatic, they apply outside marriage - even simply in how we treat other people. 

What have you learned in your own relationship? What can you advice Jovi and I as we enter marriage?

-C. 

God himself said to Adam: “It is not good for man to be alone” (Genesis 2:18) His answer to a man’s need is a woman.

Source:

Gary Chapman's, "The Marriage You've Always Wanted"

Travel: The Grand Canyon

At the Mather point overlook, the sunlight hit peaks of the mile-high rocks, just as when its middle portion are still blue. Shadows and highlights moved faster than my own head movements. I pulled my jacket, scarf and hat closer to my body. It's 7:07AM, in a bitter -2 degree winter morning. This is my first time to catch the sunrise at the Grand Canyon.

I've been here for a day, but it's difficult to fathom the grandiose Canyon at first glance. Mainly because people just might be too tired when they arrive. Visitors often come a long way -- my mom and I was in the car for twelve hours driving from San Diego. It's easy to say, "Okay, I've seen the seventh wonder of the world. I can leave now." I pity those who have dismissed the Grand Canyon just like that. It's one of the fewest places in the world with safe access to billion-year old rocks; oldest historical evidence of North American population, and multi-colored sunrises and sunsets. 

Mather Point at 7AM

11 AM

4PM

As a local artist said, "You only have two hours to paint/draw quickly, before the Canyon changes its colors drastically." These drastic changes hit home. I had just accepted a job offer as a programming assistant/editor at a commercial studio. That's as big as a change gets for a 22-year old alien permitted to work in the US (my current visa status, verbatim).  Even if I've done several internships at media companies before, this is my first real paid "job" out of school. I'm driving my own car, filling out tax forms, applying for social security, and have responsibility now to a career. As soon as I get back from this trip, I'm starting my first day at work -- a big incentive to enjoy what I have in front of me. No internet and phone calls. Simply, a time to inhale all of the Grand Canyon's South Rim and its 11 overlooks.

February 12th, Tuesday

My mom have always wanted to see the Grand Canyon. She's a full-fledged outdoor person who loves road trips ("Eventually, we all become our mothers.") On our first day at the park, we went straight to the Visitor Center to double-check our Grand Canyon itinerary. We are only going to be here for two days so we want to pack as much activities as possible.

Their newspaper, called the "The Guide" is the most useful thing I found. It has bus times, maps and updates. As a first to-do, I chose an ambitious hike down to one of the most famous trails in the world, the 'Angel Bright Trail.' After a few yards walking down, my mom slipped. I fell on my behind too, almost breaking my camera lens in half. At that point, we decided to just back out. I've never declined a hike before, but it was just too dangerous without proper equipment: rain/hiking boots, mountain sticks and snow chains.

Note the icy path, deep plunge, and lack of equipment. Still happy though.

At noon, my Mom and I grabbed lunch at the Maswik Lodge's cafeteria. I've always wondered how certain foods cannot be improved, like a Mexican burrito here that was as good as the authentic ones in San Diego. I gobbled up that 700-calorie meal and took servings from my Mom's corn chowder. I highly recommend eating there -- cheap, fast and fresh. 

Next up is a sunset tour of Hermit's Route. I read up on Frommer's and learned that the South Rim has two sides: the west (Hermit's Route with seven overlooks) and east (four overlooks). All of them are accessible by car, hike, walk or bus. And this is no easy feat either - paved roads, signs and the overlooks have protective bars for tourists. I can only imagine the government's investment in this national park. The contrast too -- on one side you'll see cement and metal, on the other, wilderness. How many people have fallen off these innocent looking cliffs? (Answer: 600 since the 1870). 

Living dangerously at Pipe Creek Vista

Out of all the seven other overlooks, my mom and I settled at Hopi Point (Frommer's recommendation). There, we had a 180-degree view of South Rim's west side and partial views of the Colorado river. 

Tourist shot of Hopi Point. This place could be filled up to hundreds of people during summer's
peak season.

My mom with lit-up eyes and unmasked joy.

As soon as the sunset ended, we hurried back to our cars to prevent hypothermia. Those things are a real threat in deserts and we are in Arizona. I took a warm bath at our room Angel Bright's Lodge, plugged in a heated blanket (one of the best inventions, ever) and drifted off to sleep early. 

February 13th, Wednesday

The first thing I did upon waking up was to look at the window. "The sunrise is coming!", I shrieked.  My mom and I hauled all our belongings to the car and drove as fast as possible to Mather's Point at the Visitor Center. As soon as we parked, I ran, and left her only with echoes of my voice: "This way!"

I wanted to catch the sunrise. And I did.

Mather's Point Overlook at 6:50AM

An unedited, golden picture. At this moment, I wished I was a painter.

I thought about my impending work, the company of my beloved mother, the view in front of me, and how healthy and loved I was at that moment. I hid my camera in the bag. I smiled and took a deep yoga breath, to let all the Canyon's first color sink within.

My first connection to the Grand Canyon was witnessing it at the crack of dawn. Hi from my mom and I!

Even though the drive to Dessert View is last on our itinerary, it apparently has the best view of the entire South Rim. These are pictures on the way to the 25-mile drive there: Yaki Point, Pipe Creek Vista, and Lipan Point.

Winter hiking OOTD at Yaki Point

The 'Rim Trail' with leftover snow

At Desert View, there's a watch tower designed by Mary Colter. An important figure of Grand Canyon's history, this architect fought to preserve ruins and honor natural structures. One of them is Bright Angel Lodge, where we stayed at. Anyway, this is the Desert View Watch Tower.

Here at the park, the colors change as fast as the rocks are old. Gold, blue, brown, pink, red -- all within hours of each other. The Vishnu Temple, a rock formation at the Grand Canyon, has evidence of existing for 1.5 billion years. That's half the age of planet earth. Four years ago, I wanted an American education. Then I wanted to work. Now, I have achieved all that. And I want more - tenure, challenges, creative freedom, to learn and enrich in a professional setting. The Grand Canyon goes through changes so easily and honorably, as if a mere checklist. That's one lesson for a mere youngster like me. 

The best picture of all?

Saved the best for last.

Happy Thursday!

-C. 

Notes about my holiday trip to the Philippines (Part 2)

Moved out and renovated a house in Cavite. Brought family to Cebu. Kawasan Falls. Vacationed in Davao for the first time. Got engaged.

Highlights of my 35-day trip to the Philippines. The first post is about when I brought my siblings to Cebu. 

Second up: Davao, and getting engaged.

-------

Wolen had to go back to his OJT at Orchard, Ces needed to train with the ICTSI National Team, and Ace had school. As my siblings left Cebu, I could finally give all my attention to one person. Jovi was a phenomenal host. I always tell him "thank you for everything" but no words could repay him. I figured I would just be a nice girlfriend and cook him a three-course dinner. So one night, I made him fillet muniere, roasted corn, apple salad with yogurt vinaigrette, and molten lava cake. He said, "Pwede ka na maging asawa."

In my mind, I thought: "You bet. Pag asawa mo ko sobrang sarap ng pagkain natin, derived pa from Paleo." Hahaha

Within a few days, Jovi and I packed for a wedding in Davao. The groom, Keenan Ugarte, was one of Jovi's golf friends. We knew that this might be one of the biggest weddings we will ever attend. The bride, Monica Floirendo and family, own the world-class Pearl Farm Resort. Do you know the feeling that something good is going to happen even before it does?

Buffet breakfast with my perennial date. 

Gotta love Davao, a progressive city. No smoking policy, metered taxi cabs, and wide, clean roads. 

One morning, I snuck out to try the pool and jacuzzi. 

A villa in an exclusive island is only around $300/night. Say what, Vegas?

I enjoyed staying at Waterfront because of the decor and this view. The floors were made of wood. I don't why, but everything just smelled so fresh. And the food -- our first lunch was at Vikings, at eat-all-you-can splendor only found in the Philippines. At night, we took a boat to Pearl Farm to attend the wedding's welcome dinner. I gouged on cassava, seaweed salad, and softest, freshest, tastiest humba (pork belly) of my life. Thank you to Keenan and Monica for being foodies. Your guests were spoiled!

Rough weather but overall, the wedding was luxe, the speeches were fun and food was crazy good. Congratulations again, Keenan and Monica. This is the wedding's official video: 

Davao is Jovi's favorite place because that's where he learned he passed the Bar exam, played his lowest round in PAL there, and won it with the team last year. On our last day in Davao, Jovi hired a taxi cab to drive us to the Philippine Eagle Center. In a small rain shed filled with mosquitos and mud, he kneeled down and asked:

"Tal, will you marry me?"

I was more stunned about the ring that I didn't answer for a few seconds. I even thought the whole thing was a joke. But there he was, Jovi, scared and sweaty that I might say no. How could I? God had given me the perfect man to be my partner for life.

Jovi and I shortly after the proposal. Beneath the Malagos Farm's, "Lover's sculpture."

Truth to be told, I would marry Jovi without an engagement ring. He often jokes about doing a civil wedding in the Liloan City Hall. Or a quick and cheap ceremony in Las Vegas. I actually wouldn't mind that. He didn't even need to propose, because my answer would be always be a yes.

In Jovi, I found a generous, self-less person who is phenomenal in taking care of me. Love, in all sense of the word -- being a good influence, accepting my tragedies and quirks, to keeping my feet on the ground wherever I was in the world. And also because he promised me a lifetime supply of puto bumbong. Hahaha

The next few days were a blur of friends barraging us about the proposal story, the giant ring, and wedding plans. My last day in Cebu was spent with his close friends in the Buyong beach house, sipping wine with kids playing on the side, and warning me: "You better be used to this." I'm marrying not only Jovi, but the context of his life. When I move to Cebu later in the year, I still wouldn't understand Bisaya perfectly. Nor am I assured that I'd adapt so easily.

Some of my friends are still in school, many still swimming in the dating scene. Am I too young? I still have personal matters to tend to in San Diego. Nevertheless, I said yes. It would have been had Jovi asked me earlier or even if this happened years in the future. It was inevitable, this is the man I'd marry anyway. And anywhere. 

Cheers, Jovi Neri!